8 Signs they are cheating

Hello Ladies and Gentlemen,

We live in a culture that expresses gas lighting on the partner who doesn't cheat. He/she wasn't doing enough in the bedroom, he/she wasn't making enough time, he/she works too much and the excuses go on. If you take time to listen to another person's past relationships of those you encounter through your life, you'll find a bunch of these stories. For more, just go to Reddit where the stories seem to explode. Yet it's hard to find people who talk about where the red signs were. Many people will say, there were no red signs. Yet when you stop and think, you see the red signs and you may wonder, will I see the red signs? This blog will help you out. Knowing red signs before going into a relationship or even before getting too invested, will help you spot them no matter how emotionally invested you are. Not all of these signs are absolute, and they may not be cheating yet. These signs are clear signs that your relationship needs to be addressed before it gets out of hand.

I'm more of a catch

Strong relationships come from both couples believing they've got a catch. Even outsiders may not understand it, but both will see qualities in the other that they believe is better than them. This creates an atmosphere of respect because they admire the qualities and pushes both to continue to improve themselves. When this lacks, it can cause so many problems. You never want to be with someone who sees themselves as more of a catch than you. You'll be able to tell by how they look at you, how they talk to others about you, and just the general respect they give you. As women, we love to talk about what we love. What we love helps define us. If you happen to catch your woman telling her friends not to come to your state because there aren't any good men without talking about how lucky she was to find you, she may not think that highly of you in the first place. If a man constantly talks about how lucky you are to have him, without any indication he's lucky to have found you, it may be time to look at the rest of his behavior. Men and women will always express to others how lucky they are because their partner is a catch. A common thought process is that they can get any man/woman out there and their partner should be grateful. Now this can be fixed. Simply by working on yourself. The question may come up on if you should try to fix it. I happen to believe that you shouldn't. It's a behavior of thought. If you ever slip up on watching your weight or not wear makeup, loose your job, then you'll be back to square one. You want someone who values you as much as themselves, not values themselves higher.

Picks stupid fights

Is she really yelling at you because you came home 5 minutes late? Is he ready to blow his top over that toilet paper roll being put on a different way? If your partner is starting fights over simple, little problems then you have a bigger problem on your hands. Do they seem to leave after every fight they start and go to their mom's house? There are fights not worth fighting over and anyone happy in their relationship knows this. I'm not talking about him working a 12 hour shift after no sleep. I'm also not talking about her getting home after a long day and her boss sends her more to get done before the next day. Outbursts after stressful situations can be traced back to the main root. If you can't find the main root of the problem, or it happens so often then it's time to look at your relationship. Call them out on it. Yes that means when they go to leave, shrug your shoulders and say: "You started this fight all on your own." Don't go along with it. As in don't fight back. It may bring them back down to earth, and they give you a reason for their behavior. If they don't and walk out in a huff, they don't want to fix the relationship.

Sketchy/hidden with the phone or social media

I remember my phone going off and my man told me about it one night and I asked him what it said. Like any other time, he reads it and we continue what we're doing. This is normal for both of us where we'll ask the other what the message or e-mail alert is, usually because the other is closer at the time to the phone. When others see this, they look at you like you have three heads. "You guys have that much trust in each other?" As a young woman in her twenties, I used to look at them with the same incredulous stare. "You don't?" Now, I see this as a red flag. If you can't go on your spouses' social media or phone at any point, then it's time to look closer at the reason. That doesn't mean you take his phone as soon as he gets home, Ladies. It means that he volunteers it. Now he/she could have a secrete phone. I'm not saying this means they are cheating, but being secretive other than gifts, is not a healthy relationship. Honesty is a huge part of spending the next 20-50 years with the same person. the one person you should never have to censor yourself around is your partner. The same goes with them. Yes, this means their work phone too.

Changes in the bedroom.

This is about as much of a red flag as you can get. If there are sudden changes you two didn't discuss and you know they don't watch porn, well it's time to really look for other red flags. The bedroom is a vulnerable part of a relationship, so most successful couple will talk about the changes they want to do in the bedroom before hand. "Hey I read about this position I really want to try with you!" They will normally bring you the article they read or maybe one of their friends mentioned it to them. Either way if changes happen or they stop having sex as much, there is something really wrong. I'm not talking about they are too tired one night of the week. This will be something noticeably different. Maybe something they always made time before but then you two had a month long dry spell. Be careful with this one as those involved will make up a lot of excuses.

You're crazy, Gas lighting

This will be where they turn every issue you try to fix or point out back on you. "Why are you so nosy?" "You're paranoid" Trust me, there are a lot more. Anyone who doesn't take what you are saying that is wrong with the relationship to heart, probably don't value the relationship. They seem to turn you into the bad person and accuse you of being crazy or seeing things that aren't there. This is a red flag but it also could be a highlight for more wrong with the relationship then cheating. If you two can't work out your problems together and be able to talk about them, your relationship will roll right off the cliff.

You're cheating aren't you?

A common thing that comes after you try to address problems with some one who is cheating, is that they'll accuse you of it. All of a sudden the non stop questions, asking you to prove where you were, smell you when you get home, when in reality they are the one cheating. Some people try to push their partners to the breaking point so they will cheat and their past behavior is not as severe. "Well we both cheated so we're even." Um no. Cheating is a sign of an unhealthy relationship. So if they start pushing your buttons, accusing you of cheating then it's time to ask yourself if you think they're cheating.

Disclosure statement

If someone tells you they cheated in the past, take it seriously! I don't know how many times I've heard the guy telling her that he cheated, and then she's surprised when he did it to her. "They said they've learned and changed from that, though!" What world are you living on? When a man or woman tells you that they've cheated in the past and seem to find excuses for it or or brag about it, run! Chances are, you aren't the special one that will change him/her. It's a behavior and behaviors are hard to change. By them telling you about their past it's like a disclosure statement. "See I told you I had struggled with it in the past." If someone you're dating does tell you about their cheating past, it's time to take a step back emotionally. This doesn't mean it's over as some people can change after help or a slap in the face called reality. This does mean that they'll need to prove themselves more before you'll become emotionally invested.

Intuition

"I just had this feeling, something was wrong." Always go with your gut. Most of the time, even when no other red flags are present, your gut feeling is not something you should ignore. There is not much more to say about his. It's a feeling of dread, shivers, the feeling deep down that something just doesn't add up. Don't push this feeling down. Consider your gut feeling like a super power humans have that many have lost the ability to understand it. 6th sense, a warning from god, whatever you may call it, listen to it. It will often tell you before you see the red flags that something is wrong. If you are one of those who seems to have lost the ability, below are some books you can read to reawaken it. Yes you should take this step as humans have used this instinct to survive long ago and it serves you well once you understand it. Never underestimate how important this skill is not only for relationships but also every day life.

That's all for this blog post but I really hopes this helps anyone who may need this. If you have a opinion or a story of your own about this topic, leave a comment and let me know what you think. Have a topic for a blog post? Go to my website and e-mail me and I will thank you when I type the blog. Want to help support me? Share the blog, subscribe to the e-mail, or become an affiliate to help bring traffic. In a world where having an opinion that differs from the current ideologies, traffic and viewer support helps me stay independent through ads shown on my site and revenue through my store. If you want to make a donation go my website where you will see a donate button through Paypal. I'm starting to put Classical Lady merchandise on my ClassicalLady website so keep checking back to see new items. Thank you to all of my current subscribers and affiliates for the support as I work to bring you new perspectives, or even just a fun read. Stay tuned for the next blog!

Over the next few weeks I will be slowly changing the posts I will be uploading to turn my blog into a lifestyle blog instead of the dating bog it seems to have become. This will include finance, cooking, gardening, self improvement, ways to save money, and more. Don't worry, I will still upload a post about relationships at least three times a week. I will just start uploading other posts as well to expand what I have to offer you, my readers. I will also be starting a Youtube channel on Classical Lady about relationships specifically, in the coming months so stay tuned. Remember to take hold of your own future.